Newsflash to the WORLD! (Especially Eurpoeans and Australians): I LOVE YOU.

Monday, Jun. 13, 2005 ~ 9:33 a.m.

Brief weekend newsflash: Watched Ocean's 12, practiced parallel parking, am parallel parking QUEEN, am nervous about driving test tomorrow, moved stuff into my bedroom, power went out, computer crashed, computer is back up, have credit card at Zellers now (WOOT!), woke up at 5am this morning.

And in other exciting news that deserves more than a brief little two word blurb to inform you about - my theory works!!

See, I have this theory that if you are too shy to just go up and talk to a guy, you should just talk really loudly to your friends in his presence, and make sure that you are seen and heard plenty. Eventually he will become intrigued and approach you for conversation. This works especially well if you have already made yourself look like an idiot a couple of times when trying to cultivate conversation that you initiate on your own. Actually, this is the first time.. wait.. no.. second time that this has worked for me. Let me tell you about it.

Time the first:

When I was just a young greenhorn, going to Youth group on a regular basis, we would always go to May Rally, and every May Rally, I would see this same guy. He did some drama pieces, played guitar and bass, and had a hearing impairment. He was also completely ON FIRE, and an absolute inspiration. I desperately wanted to kiss him, and found out, through a little sleuthing and listening very carefully that his name was Elliot. I still wanted to kiss him. OKay, okay, not the best thing to be running through my mind at a Christian youth retreat, but anyways, I digress. I did my best to make myself seen and heard and it took THREE WHOLE YEARS worth of May Rally for it to happen, but finally, on the last May Rally that we went to, Sarah and I went into a room to watch the Fear Factor thingie that they were running, and, with the choice of a million other empty seats, lo and behold, but who should sit down next to me, and introduce himself, but ELLIOT! He chatted with me for a little while, and I never kissed him, but hey - my theory worked!

Case the second:

Friday (I think, or Thursday, maybe?), I was sitting here all innocent and unsuspecting when I hear the distinctly perfect accented voice of the British guy, Mike Turner (you can't just call him Mike, you have to call him Mike Turner, as there have been many Mike's in my life thus far, and I just like to say Mike Turner instead.. ANYWAYS, I digress...), and the conversation went something like this:

MT: Excuse me, are you on the phone?
ME: Uh.. no. (insert panic here, thinking Ack! I must be in trouble, something must be wrong!)
MT: Do you know how to read French people's handwriting?
ME: (Uhh... it's like any other handwriting)

So he proceeds to show me this paper with some French names written on them and I guess he has to send these people letters. Anyways, he couldn't decipher (or figure out) if the clearly written "Alberte" on his page should be "Albert" or "Alberte" (although it was clearly the latter). So I thought his request was a little silly, until he explained that all Germans write the same way, so he thought all French might write the same way. I hoped he would go away after that, because I was extremely nervous, my hands were sweating, and also, on my computer behind me, I had my horse racing sim game open, and I didn't want him to think I was a total loser playing with Digital Ponies when I should be dutifully filling the needs of the company instead. He didn't go away. He stuck around, asked me if French was my first language, and then we talked about languages some. He knows my name, obviously, because he's talked to me (though I've never introduced myself), and I am sure he's heard me introducing myself on the phone. Anyways, I think we made astounding progress, leaps and bounds from the last time I talked to him:

Some guy: Wow, into hockey already?
MT: Yeah, well.. it's alright.
Me: It's not exactly Canada's most interesting point.
MT: -blank stare-
Me: I grew up in a hockey high school, I'm pretty sick of it.
MT: .. yeah...

And then the time after that when I was waiting to rinse out one of my dishes after I'd eaten my lunch and he was washing his hands at the sink, and I stood there, waiting:

MT: Sorry.
Me: Don't worry about it.

It wouldn't be such a big deal if I didn't have the huge problem of absolutely falling in love with anyone who has a European accent. I want to date the boys and I want to be best friends with the girls. Everytime I get a caller with a European or Australian accent, I simply melt. I would let them take the car for free if they asked me. I am a Eurowhore. So sad, but true.

I thought I might do a couple of surveys cause I am bored, and because I haven't given enough information out for people to stalk me with and also because I was going to do them while I waited for Denis to get here, but he's not coming, as today is his day off, and I am sad. I think I'll just go stare at the blank ugly walls of my pod now and wait for someone European to walk by me.